Holy crap, I'm in pain.
44.5/44 miles... and I'm feeling each little piece of that last half mile. Oooowwwwwiiiiieeee!
All errands that were to be done outside the apartment are now moved to Monday, and I'm going to spend the rest of the day lying down and doing homework. Will probably go to that football game with a few friends tonight.

So I saw Papa Yella again today. Twice. In the time it took me to get 2/3 of the way back across the loop (granted, I was going slower, I was on my 30something-ish mile) he'd passed by me twice...
WHO IS THIS GUY!?!?!??!?!?!?!??!!??!!?
and I couldn't just turn around and give chase because... well... I'm a wuss, and I hurt :(

But I went fast!!!!!!!!! I'm finally keeping pace with people on the course, and not slowing down as much up the hills. But I hurrrrrrrt!
Let me give you an example. I park on a hill just by the entrance to Lawther Dr. from Mockingbird, where there is a rather lovely parking lot with a picnic area with a view and one of those stone structures that provide shade while you eat (me no think of good word now for to describe). So my last half a kilometer is uphill, to my car. Its painful but fun. Well, I was pretty out of it, and looking down and kept thinking, "oh man, oh man... just another half a kilometer" and the hill started feeling really easy. I was peddling faster, and thinking, "Alright! I've got some energy left." And then I hit the wall.
... no really.
I had already climbed the hill, passed the parking lot, passed my car, and peddled on flat ground right into the picnic area, and into the wall (thinking I was still on the hill). Luckily I didn't hit it head on, but it clipped me on the shoulder, and I nearly went down. So the bike is fine, and luckily there were no witnesses. My body on the other hand is a bit pissed off at me. Yeah that was fun. Lesson for the day: keep your head up, and look where you're going (which I did, right up until that last half a kilometer).

After putting my bike up, I sat down on the grass and watched the cyclists and runners pass by on the path below. I was having trouble with a homework problem yesterday. It took me all morning, and most of my night to get it (though I finally did), and all the while I was wondering "what am I doing here? I'm going to fail, I don't belong here, why am I in Texas?" blah blah blah. Sitting on the hill, and realizing I had two more questions just like that one (that would probably take me as long) to do before Thursday, I realized: this is where I'm supposed to be, and I like it here. Not the path, not the trail, but Dallas, SMU, the department.
I could be in Montreal studying Hispanic culture, in the middle of a bunch of French Speakers. As good as the program was, I wouldn't be where I was supposed to be, and I wouldn't be happy with the program. I could be at KU getting a dead-end MA in the hopes that a blind department would throw me a bone and let me in the PhD program after a year. I could be studying with two of my (still) favorite professors: one who very well could be dead at any time, and the other who's interests seem to get further and further from what I want to do (he's more theoretical, I'm leaning more toward applied). I could be in Tulsa or Kansas City working a crap job for poor wage and struggling against all my other co-workers for a way to advance and "do what I want to do." I could be in Tulsa, or Kansas City and always have friends around to call and have fun with (all of whom I miss dearly). But I'd never make it to Buenos Aires or Tierra del Fuego on that. I'd never have a real chance to use my Spanish, and I'd never have a real chance to explore all the aspects of economics and math that I want to. And I wouldn't get the PhD... which I want.
I applied to SMU on a lark based on the off-hand suggestion of Prof. Mohammed (one of my favorite professor's) and my father's encouragement of that suggestion. And here I am in Dallas. Very few friends, very little to do but bike and study... and I'm happier than I've been since high school. Why on earth would I give this up now? I like the work (why else am I getting into the Lee Center at 9 AM to do homework?), I like the professors, I like the students... and I'm starting to adapt to "the bubble" of Highland Park.
For the next four to five years, this is where I'm supposed to be, and I'm going to fight (qualifying exams in march and April) to stay here.

So anyway... got a wedding to go to on Oct. 2 (WOOHOO!), might do this Ardmore bike trail with a friend of mine from OK over Fall break (70 miles), and I might have Larryville visitors during the KU fall break (both of whom are very welcome). Big semester. Lots o' studying left to do today. That and recovering... going to finish off the lasagna I made (microwaved) last night.