Yes, I actually have friends (2)

Ah, Ben. My family knows most of these notorious stories. For your reading pleasure, the things my family has been laughing and scratching their head over for about ten years now.

I first met Ben when I was 8th grade after changing schools. I was still looking for a niche. I mean... everyone at this school was a nerd. I'd have to NOT be a nerd to not fit in. So there was no way to bond over a "us vs. them" mentality as with Brian. In fact, the way I met Ben was through his girlfriend. At the time, she wasn't his girlfriend though. In fact, Ben started dating the girl that I liked in 8th grade, and I very much wanted to dislike him for it. But he was just such a cool guy. I started hanging out with him to get close to her, then when they broke up before 8th grade was over, I had a decision to make: keep a friend or pursue a girl who at that time I really wasn't that into anymore. Nah. Went with the Bro Code on that one. After all its not everyday you find a friend (or group of friends) that you can sing Alice in Chains songs with during Washington DC tours ("I'm the maaaaaaaaan in the box!")

We had joked through 8th grade about starting a band with our friend Zach, and I became the arbitrary bassist. They needed one. I was there. Except lucky for them, I really WANTED to play bass. So when I got my Yamaha in 8th grade (with money I had saved up for over a year and a half: $350 dollars), I became the bassist for Ben's as yet unnamed band. We went through several names. "Ben G. and the Chocolate Russels." "The Chocolate Russels." "The Sweet Potatoes." Many names between that which I can't remember.
We played a few Crosby, Stills, and Nash songs, some Bush (which we later discarded as being too easy), some Alice in Chains, R.E.M., U2, and of course: the Counting Crows. Our heroes of depressing music. Because being depressed in the 90's was cool.

Despite getting rid of all non-Christian music in 8th and 9th grade, and becoming very active in my church, I still hung out with Ben, and I still played Counting Crows songs with them. This was a bit of a conflict, but of all the friends I had Ben was the one who was always willing to listen to me no matter what I was saying (which I couldn't say for all my friends). Ben and I talked about religion, spirituality, dreams, music, books, history, economics, alternative history (what if this and this happened instead?), our friends, what-have-you.

Ben was the best guy I knew to bounce ideas off of. When I was young in my faith and very talkative about it, he was one of the few friends who pateintly sat through everything I said. A few people stopped talking to me because they were sick of hearing about it. Ben never stopped. He also never stopped questioning me on it and challenging me. When I started having serious doubts in high school, he was as critical of that as when I was supposedly so confident in my religion. Ironically as some one who didn't share my faith (at least not a faith in something so specific) he was more instrumental at getting me to believe again as any of my Christian friends who would blow off the doubts that I had (though I must also say I had a few very good Christian friends who like Ben would entertain any and all doubts, and talked about it at length, never wavering in their own belief). He also knew when I was "piling it to the ceiling" and when I was serious.
Seems a trivial note now: but Ben was there when I bought my first non-Christian CD in two years. "Live Across A Wire" by the Counting Crows.

As far as high school shenanigans? Oh, plenty. We would drive out to Memorial Drive with his souped up VW bug (by souped-up I mean he had a better stereo system installed to drawn out the engine noises), drive up next to all the Union kids in pick-ups playing Limp Bizkit or Travis Tritt, and we would blair the tape of our own recordings. Oh yeah. We were bad. We had one "big" concert at Ben's Unitarian church, where we opened for a much more popular high school band at the time. We played one or two of Ben's originals, and then some Crows' covers. I actually had two guys come up to me a week after and say, "Hey, weren't you the guys who sounded like the Counting Crows?" This was a huge compliment for me, but coming from a Freshmen (I was a sophmore), I didn't put too much stock in it. Anything sounds cool to Freshmen. Joy and Emily joined the band later on when Joy and I met while we were in the school musical "Damn Yankees!" Ben was shocked that I actually had the ability to go up to a girl, start talking, and then suddenly get her to join a band with two guys she hardly knew. Joy's dad at first was suspiscious of us, but later on he realized we were okay. He's a cool guy. Joy also brought in our new lead singer Emily, and "the Sweet Potatoes" name was thought up by Joy's mom. Our band had solidified for its high school golden years. We had one more concert that we put together above the garage, which a friend of ours opened for with his DJing. It's easy, but not as cool to jump off of amps that are only a foot high. Hey... we rocked out though. Oh yeah. For Ben's birthday one year he got studio time and we actually recorded a CD. We sold four copies to Japanese exchange students, so we can always say that we're "Big in Japan."

Ben would make moonshine in his closet for fun during junior and senior year, and one night we walked around my neighborhood drinking hooch and discussing politics. He partook in the cigarettes that I stole from my sister's "victory pack" that she bought when she turned 18. And that was just in high school. When I nearly coughed up a lung on the first (and last cigarette) I ever tried, his relentless teasing about what a whimp I was kept me from ever trying a cigarette again. We witnessed the stray beer bottle that decked Ed Roland at Edge-Fest (as well as several red-neck fights), and we wrote songs about sandwhiches and tire irons. My choices when I was around Ben were probably not the wisests, but if I had to make these mistakes, I'm glad I made them with some I trusted like Ben. I was a bit of a sneak and a rebel when I was a kid, that's for sure.

In college he went in-state and I went out-of-state. We'd meet up during the summers to jam, sit on the porch and talk economics/history/girls/what-have-you. I got a few post cards from his trip to Russia, and got to hear all about the shenanigans of his St. Petersburg trip over cold gin and tonic during warm weather on his porch. His parents, I hope, have kept those comfy rocking chairs that are out there.

Ben visits Topeka every now and then to see his current girlfriend and will drop by for a drink and some good old fashioned conversation. One of the times he was over we actually pulled out the instruments and were surprised to find that we actually remember how to play some of our songs. "Tire Iron" was of course easily memorable for me (heck, I wrote it), "All Except the End", and "Something in the Air" (which is in no way related to the much better Tom Petty song). And of course the song that my parents remember. I can't remember the title. All I remember is Emily and Ben screaming "YEEEEAAAAAH YEAAAAAH" as loud as they could and as off-key as possible.

So now you know most of the story behind Ben, my Hippy friend. Who's next?
How about Jeffy-poo?